Wilson Graf Consulting

I say "guaranteed" date disasters, but that may be a little too strong a word. After all, it is possible to find a cool chick that can handle your geeky obsessions—but the likelihood of that happening is remote at best. So, if you have a date this weekend, it is probably in your best interest to hide gadgets that could be viewed negatively by women—gadgets like those found after the break.

If the Clapper is bad, a Star Trek Voice Activated Light Dimmer is liable to have her hospitalized for tearing a muscle in a fit of laughter. This geeky gem plugs into any standard wall outlet and can be illuminated in three brightness levels using simple voice commands—which will be confirmed by the voice of Majel Roddenberry herself. It also doubles as a night light—and we all know how much women love men who are afraid of the dark. Available for $69.99. [Kleargear]

Creepy binoculars that make you seem like a pedophile are a definite no-no. So steer clear of these plushes with built-in binoculars. [Global Sources via Link]

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I hate to break it to you guys, but there probably isn't a woman out there that would be interested in having sex with the Dr. Who Dalek, Optimus Prime, or the Dalek Sec Hybrid. So get those voice-changing helmets out of sight. Priced at $79.99, $34.99 and $64.99 respectively. [Dalek and Optimus Prime and Dalek Sec Hybrid]

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As impressive as your collection of Star Wars figures, video games, and squirt guns might be, many women will be turned off by a hobby that requires a significant financial investment—not to mention a dedicated wing of your home.

Religious fanatics are just plain creepy—so avoid over-the-top imagery like this Miracle Eyes Jesus plaque. If a woman sees a statue of Jesus with eyes that follow you around the room, she is going to think that you are in some sort of applesauce eating, Kool-Aid drinking cult. Besides, "Jesus didn't come to Earth to give us the willies." Available for $8.75. [Merch-Bot]

When a woman enters your bathroom for the first time, she is going to poke around in there. We all do it. So, make sure that anything incriminating is disposed of properly. This is especially true if you happen to own one of these Turd Twisters. Basically, it is a device similar to those old Play-Doh machines that transform the dough into various shapes—only, instead of Play-Doh you are using your own feces. In all seriousness though, if you do use one of these, do the world a favor and stop dating altogether (no need to breed!). Available for $14.89. [Prank Place via Link]

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Finally, the furniture you select to decorate your home says a lot about you. And if you happen to have a coffee table shaped like an NES controller (or a coffin) and a dresser resembling the lower half of a naked woman—that says you are a twisted, geeky pervert. A bed with springs for legs won't help boost your image either. [NES Table and Coffin Table and Sexy Furniture and Spring Bed]

newVideoPlayer("mpsii2_gizmodo.flv", 494, 349,""); Remember yesterday's drooltastic Motion Pro II racing simulator? Here's how it works and how much it costs. We talked with Chris Considine—CXC Simulations head honcho—who tells us that yes, people actually buy these things even if they cost more than a car: the Motion Pro II starts at $25,995, but he said that a client spent $45,000 on one, after add-ons. See the complete shopping list—and high definition pictures from a real system—after the jump.

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Base model: $25,995 (one screen)

Add-ons

Panoramic display system: $12,995
Six-speed gated shifter and progressive clutch upgrade: $1,049.95
Sequential shifter and hand brake: $1,049.95
Mobility System: $529.95
Carbon fiber bodywork kit: $1,799.95
Advanced on-site setup and training: $2,995

The other options, like the custom paint for the bodywork, are listed as "Call." And then you have to add the software, like Rfactor for $450 or Race for $195. Too expensive to buy? You can rent one: six hours for $1,400 or a week for $12,200, plus two operators at $750 for half a day. And shipping. [CXC Simulations—full video at Inside Sim Racing]

The rumored Sidekick Slide Scarlet (read: red edition) is available now from T-Mobile. It's just about the same as the regular Sidekick Slide, with myFaves support, QVGA display, microSD slot, 1.3-megapixel camera and all the Sidekick features that kids love. The phone's only major difference is the color Scarlet, and unlike the similarly-named actress, can be yours for just $199 with two-year contract. [T-Mobile]

We've reviewed MacBook and MacBook Pro battery chargers before, but the problem with that is that they aren't compatible between different laptop types. Not so with FastMac's U-Charge. Their external battery charger lets you juice up MacBook Pro (15 and 17-inch), MacBook, PowerBook G4, iBook, and even PowerBook G3 batteries externally all from the same unit.

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Why would we need this? Because we go through multiple batteries in a day of liveblogging, and this is the perfect thing to charge up more than one battery at night without having to wake up multiple times in the middle of the night to swap them out from your laptop. At $69, it's fantastic, and even better than the Newertech charges since it charges pretty much every recent Apple laptop. [Fastmac]